Extraversion vs Introversion

Now and then a book I'm reading will cause a breakthrough in my thinking and of course also in my experiencing of the inner and outer world. I think it was two years ago that I read "Please understand me" by David Keirsey and Marilyn Bates. A book I strongly recommend to everyone, in particular those puzzled by their own behaviour (almost everyone).

This book helped me to clarify my personality (INFJ) in context to everything, in particular to the way I function within my family but also within society. I myself am an introvert although I occasionally have periods of extraversion. I was often confused by this and by the way most people (extraverts) reacted to my introversion and how I reflected this upon myself. Based on Jungian typology the following extract is from the book:

The person who chooses people as a source of energy probably prefers extraversion, while the person who prefers solitude to recover energy may tend towards introversion.

Extraverts with their need for sociability, appear to be energized or "tuned up" by people. Talking to people, playing with people, and or working with people is what charges their batteries. Extraverts experience loneliness when they are not in contact with people.

While an extrovert is sociable, the introvert is territorial. That is, he desires space: private places in the mind and private environmental places. Introverts seem to draw their energies from a different source than do extroverts. Pursuing solitary activities, working quietly alone, reading, meditating, participating in activities which involve few or no other people - these seem to charge the batteries of the introvert. This is not to say that introverts do not like to be around people, introverts enjoy interacting with others but it drains their energy in a way not experienced by extraverts.

The question always arises, "does an extravert also have an introverted side and does not an introvert have an extraverted side?" Yes, of course. But the preferred attitude, whether it be extraversion or introversion, will have the most potency and the other will be the "suppressed minority." The preferred attitude will be expressed in the conscious personality. The suppressed minority is only partly in consciousness and reflects "what happens to one." This less favoured side of a persons temperament is less differentiated and is less energized, and is apt to be more primitive and underdeveloped.

If a person prefers extraversion, his choice coincides with about 75% of the general population (Bradway 1964). Only 25% reported introversion as their preference, according to Myers (Bradway, 1964). Indeed western culture seems to sanction the outgoing, sociable, and gregarious temperament. The notion of anyone wanting or needing much solitude is viewed rather as reflecting an unfriendly attitude. Solitary activities frequently are seen as ways to structure time until something better comes along, and this something better by definition involves interacting with people. As a consequence, introverts are often the ugly ducklings in a society where the majority enjoy sociability. There is a story about a mother heard to protest loudly and defensively, "My daughter is not an introvert. She is a lovely girl!"

Introverts have reported going through much of their lives believing that they ought to want more sociability, and because they do not, are indeed ugly ducklings who can never be swans. As a result, the introvert seldom provides adequately for his very legitimate desire for territoriality, for breathing room, without experiencing a vague feeling of guilt.