I saw them cross the twilight of an age, The sun-eyed children of a marvellous dawn, The great creators with wide brows of calm, The massive barrier-breakers of the world
19/04/2007
the medication is numb
friday 13 april
I’m back in reality, still under influence. I think I have to experience this night as if it were my last, still confined here though. I just need to totally let go, because fear is useless right now. I need to drink a lot of beer and smoke a lot of weed. I need to get out of the labyrinth but its best not to be sober; I wouldn’t be able to handle it otherwise. I done this kind of thing so many times now, I know how to ride it out. I know just about how to handle this loss of reality, sober is how the trips always start, then after the worst is over, just after the peak I start to medicate it, shake it, totally differentiate myself from it, waste everything and gradually let go. Still in the aftershock I recollect and slowly rise but it’s really no surprise to no one, because this kind of thing is becoming the norm. Shake it and medicate it and try not to feel shame, get back to playing the game. Fear is useless right now but I know the medication is numb.
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did you take some shrooms or something?
ReplyDeletehaha, I was not actually tripping, but I was tripping sober, a little psychotic, now and again my brain has a kind of episode (trip) and I kind of lose touch with my energy and sink into deep, dark places.
ReplyDeleteIts sometimes hours, sometimes days but I always come back stronger and wiser.
Its also my body and brain adapting to the energy increase, alot of shit comes up to the surface and needs to be released.
I go well on shrooms, its been awhile, hmmm. One with the earth and all that:)