old=new

I found out about the old way that's now a drain, it used to be so lively, at least there was a pushing forward, unconciously enjoying the identity and I deem it bought pleasure though there was also pain, and the feeding of extremes. The new way is gentle and humble, accepts all things, and loves them unconditionally.

dark aspects?

Sometimes you think you've worked through some issue, or dark aspect of self, only to find it return with great intensity, most often just when you were beginning to enjoy the new levels of good stuff and expanded consciousness gained from having cleared the negativity.
What the dark aspects within and without really want is just to be loved and accepted, to be seen for what they are and not ignored, denied or judged, naturally all parts want to be integrated into the whole.
Darkness is an illusion that is there to serve a purpose, it has been created to teach/experience. We can be thankful for such a diligent teacher.

end of an era 3

2012 summer solstice

Reached the borderlands, crossing over now into a new realm.
The time of dark exploration is behind me.
It has been a cleansing cycle of late, leaving me in silence, emergence from the shadow regions.
Such deep breathing, such calm as never before, so reassuring finally touching down on the real earth.
I have left a persona behind, shed my skin of the karma, paid my dues, all is new and yet this ancient being is also here, the authentic, soul rebel.
The climate has changed for me, the inner vibe has completely changed, some would shrug it off as 'reaching adulthood' or 'maturing' but this is something far more profound.
The control systems no longer have any hold on me, that norm no longer constricting, in the world but not of the world, this has new meaning to me.
So cometh forth the ancient flow of healing and I the silent vessel.

2012 so far

Expansion, clearing and cleansing of blokkages in the energy field. Anxiety at the speed of the transformative waves of energy but a thrill to be alive is there too. There is a will to focus on inner balance, purity of thought and speech, insight and awareness into one's core motivations. More feelings of lightness in the body because of a pure and whole diet, a respect for all beings because of increasing compassion. Feeling of spinning and vibrating, periods of intense peace and relaxation, the calm. Negativity seen for what it is, on all levels the duality on full display, pressure for a few days and then suddenly release, rollercoaster energy patterns. Final testing. Detachment and grounding easier, everything is getting easier to aquire through mental/spiritual approach. Visualization greatly enhanced. Experience of time is all different now.

answer2

It seems that once again your patience has run out and your ego wants results, although ego is a rather overused and almost negative word, it fits well in this context. All is in divine and perfect order, all things are certainly in their right place including your current personal situation, however bleak at times it may seem. If you really look beyond the frustrated emotions you will find that everything is indeed rather fine and as you would like it. There are many good things lined up for you but the timing is best left to trust.

answer1

You are reluctant because you have become accustomed to a routine or comfort zone. Sometimes you are not willing to open yourself up to situations or to people that maybe do not resonate closely with you. Assuming that it could get uncomfortable because of the strangeness. Certainly you are not wanting too much contact with people that reside in 'lower' vibrations. You say: I am too different, I am too complex, I am too psychic. Then you look at your past experiences and want to give up, claiming thus that the future is going to be the same as the past. Also, mary jane, mary fuckin' jane.

karnak

when it becomes
dark
turn my body
upward
then may I feel
again
your light

unsure

Contemplating the current residence.
Looking forward to future way of being.
Confident that there is a right time for all things to be.
Restless.

Here is where I really space out. Honouring the seperation that doesn't even exist, that is unsure of itself if it does and yet it somehow always is observed as such.

Seperation from most humans at this time.

Wondering if there is someone that knows what it's like to see this way. Unplugged from that hive mind, hence seperation, some kind of developed isolation, aware of a force pushing, cracks appear.

path of detachment

(Beware: own your personal power, it is a gift. You fall behind when you allow comparisons to make you blind. If you would walk on the path of detachment, separate yourself from this then also.)
(How can you compare yourself to those who are successful in attachment, you have failed too many times in your attempts to return to that game.)

all that is yet to be

I wish for you to imagine all that is yet to be, I am waiting for the time that you will celebrate this journey with me. Ever moving, ever removing, ever learning and turning, always silent but ready to flood you with light, and fill you with healing.

I am the brow of calm.